When you hear the beauty of Marie-Helene’s songs, it’s almost impossible to imagine the pain from which they grew.
I trust Your promises, O Lord, my God;
even if it looks like You have forgotten me,
You have hidden your face from me.
Where else can I go, if not to You?
I trust Your promises, my Jesus.
Marie-Helene was 15 years old in 2009, when a group of about 30 Islamic militants broke into her home, sexually assaulted her and then took her deep into the jungle. “Four or five times they put the machete on my neck,” she said. “I don’t know what stopped them from killing me.”
Then, two days later, they gave her the news she’d been expecting — they were going to kill her. As they tied her up, she heard one of the militants sharpening his machete. Another asked if she had any last words.
Covered in severe wounds caused by repeated assaults, barely clothed and with all hope gone, Marie-Helene began to cry. “What you are doing is not right,” she told them tearfully. “I know you will kill me, but even so, know that what you are doing is not right. Jesus loves you, and He doesn’t like what you are doing.”
As she spoke, her words seemed to carry a power beyond their simple meaning. The man who was sharpening his machete stopped, and the group fell silent. “Everybody stood quiet,” she recalled. “Then I heard the leader say, ‘Don’t shed the blood of that one, because we have tried many times to kill her. It is not happening. Maybe she has something in her, so … let’s free her. If we shed her blood, we might get in trouble’.”
Fearing an unseen force, they untied her and told her to run. But before they let her go, they warned her that if they caught her again they would not hesitate to kill her.
Marie-Helene ran. With little strength and no idea of where she was or where she was going, she fell to the ground repeatedly. But each time, she managed to get back up. She said the Lord gave her the strength to keep going until she stumbled upon a path that eventually led to a Congolese military camp.
“They wept when they saw me,” she said. Shocked at her appearance, the soldiers immediately tried to give her first aid, food and water, but she was unable to eat or drink for two days. Then they took her to a hospital, where she spent a year receiving treatment for her injuries.
When her physical wounds finally healed, she thought her suffering was over. “But that was when the true trauma started,” she said.
Marie-Helene had no idea what trauma was, but she was in its grip. Too afraid to go outside, she spent a month indoors, stopped eating and began questioning God. “I was just saying, ‘I better die’,” she said. “‘I want to die; why am I living? Why has God allowed these people to abuse me? What have I done to God? Why did He allow them to do all that to me?’”
Marie-Helene’s local Christian community embraced her and her questions. They came to pray with her, to cry with her, to comfort and console her. They also made sure she received appropriate counselling.
“I started the process of healing,” she said of the help she received at the only Christian counselling centre in that part of eastern Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC). When Marie-Helene went to her first session, she promised herself that if the counselling hurt her in any way, she would abandon everything. But she needn’t have worried.
“Praise God, I found people who have love, who are caring,” she said.
Justine Massamba is a clinical psychologist at the centre. Her mother died when she was only 18 months old, and growing up without a mother had affected all of her other relationships. But the suffering she experienced made her want to help others. “I was growing with a wounded heart,” she said. “I wanted to respond to the problems I had. Also, I was feeling compassion for vulnerable people.”
In the part of the DRC where Justine and Marie-Helene live, Islamist groups like the Allied Democratic Forces use the surrounding jungle for cover. These groups attack and kill Congolese Christians in their efforts to establish an independent Islamic state.
Thousands of Congolese have been attacked, abducted and murdered in recent years. Thousands more have taken refuge in camps for displaced people after being driven from their homes and farms by the militants.
As a university student, Justine received the help she needed to understand and heal from the emotional pain she had suffered. Today, she helps others, including women like Marie-Helene, find their own healing through professional counselling.
“We have met so many people who have lost hope of life,” Justine said, “who don’t think about church, [who are] disappointed about God and are heart-wounded.” She makes a point of explaining God’s love to her patients as she works to help heal their emotional wounds. “Counselling with the biblical perspective … goes together,” she said.
Marie-Helene gradually began to respond to the care she received, but it took time … and music.
“One day I was feeling so empty and abandoned and depressed and discouraged of life,” she said. “I sat somewhere under a tree and I started crying.” She said that in that moment, the Lord put a new song in her heart, even though she hadn’t sung since her abduction. As she started to sing, she took out her phone and recorded the melody and lyrics.
Be comforted;
take heart because your trouble will change into joy.
As she sang the song, her soul was comforted, and she felt a deep sense of relief. She shared the song with others, and soon began to compile a collection of songs that she and others wrote about God’s presence amid their struggles. It became a kind of hymnbook to help others in need of emotional healing.
Justine eventually invited Marie-Helene to work with other Christians who had suffered as she had, using her singing ability and special hymnbook to help restore their emotional health. “Today I am strong to help others,” Marie-Helene said.
She and Justine request prayer that they will be able to help many more Congolese Christians who have suffered because of their faith — transforming their inner torment with musical prescriptions that heal.
Even if I feel sadness in my heart for the whole day …
Where else can I go, if not to You?
I trust your promises, my Jesus. Amen.
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